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I feel like a glass filled to the brim, about to overflow. I have a show coming up in May, and I know that’s part of the excess energy I feel.

Time

We talked a it in one of my classes about our perception of time. How it feels like there’s some sort of post-covid time warp. I’d thought time felt so wonky because I’m so busy, getting older, and prioritizing alone time, thus more aware of how little of that I actually have. It was interesting hearing others say they’d felt the same effect, regardless of their age, schedules, or priorities.

Friendships

People say artists need down time to create. I’ve noticed this more than ever over the past year. I’ve been allowing myself to say “no” to things because of this. It’s insane when I think about it that it took me this long to recognize that giving myself space to create is valid, and doesn’t make me a bad friend. It’s also really helped me appreciate who values my company and who just saw me as an accessory. It’s wild how many people, whether intentionally or not, sprinkle in black folks as a means to say to the world, “look at me! i am NOT racist. i am cultured.” I can tell because the moment I actually express opinions, or surpass them in areas they think they should own (career, relationships, etc.) their whole demeanor switches from fun to competitive. It’s amusing to watch, and I have a lot of art centered around this topic coming up. It’s going to be amazing.

The Art Itself

I always talk about how art is a catharsis. I started the week making collages to get out my frustration with the administration and the people who jump through hoops to justify all the harm being done. This is another focus of my upcoming series, but collages allow me to quickly express and organize ideas that I’ll tackle more thoroughly with stipples later.

I’ve also been revisiting work from 2023. There were portraits I was really unhappy with. I thought the main issue was proportions, but it was something much simpler; the shading! The shadows just weren’t deep enough. But also some proportions were off too ha. I didn’t expect it to be SO satisfying correcting these issues. It also means I can put these pieces in the show! Since I no longer feel irritated when I look at them.

Conclusion

It’s fine to do things slowly.